Meeting ourselves to meet others
Starting to spend time with inner exploration opens the door to a deeper understanding of ourselves. I believe this is one of the most important journeys we can take — and it’s a lifelong one.
One of the most beautiful pieces of wisdom I know is that we can only meet others as deeply as we’ve met ourselves. It lands every time.
Self-exploration impacts others more than we often realize. Turning awareness toward the breath, for example, begins to create space within us. That space is needed if we wish not to be controlled by our busy minds, often wired for the worst. When our inner world slowly starts to settle, real connection becomes possible.
’The meeting’ is about understanding, emotionally connecting with, truly seeing and being present with another person.
Co-regulation is real, too. Another person can sense grounded energy, a calm tone of voice, steady breathing and many other subtle cues. When you’re regulated — which doesn’t mean forever calm — and connected to yourself, others often begin to feel safer within themselves too. It can almost feel like borrowing someone else’s sense of peace until your own nervous system begins to soften.
There is no other moment or place to truly meet ourselves and others than the present. But the mind so easily drifts into the past or to an imagined future and suddenly we’re no longer seeing this moment as it truly is. This is a gentle reminder — for myself too — to keep practicing getting back to this moment.
We can offer others only as deep emotional connection than what we’re able to give to ourselves. We can only accept the other person as they are if we accept ourselves with everything that we are. It’s a mirror and a yogic reminder of acceptance to remember that also others can meet us the way they have met themselves. These are things to practice on a yoga mat and beyond it.
The more we inhabit our bodies, regulate ourselves and meet ourselves with compassion, the more naturally we can offer that same compassion for others. Doesn’t that feel like a beautiful foundation for life?
